Our people have a popular saying, ko ju ma ri bi, gbogbo ara lo gun e, meaning if you have no wish to behold evil, you should avoid it by every means: you must not walk with it or talk or be found near that evil.
Me, I made the mistake of doing the opposite when I married Muyiwa Olaseyi four years ago.
I am 48 years old, so you know I was not born yesterday. I have been married once but my husband died, many years back, so four years ago, when I thought I would never even get involved with anyone, I met Muyiwa, who at that time was just 51 years old and a businessman.
We did the Nikkai and later the court wedding.
Look at my photo in the phone, this was taken just last year, see how robust I looked, see how clothes sat well on me, look at me today, can you believe it’s the same person in the photo talking to you? Well, this is how I got here.
Sometime last year, I started going to the mosque not too far from our house for Jumat. I got friendly with the Alfa because I like his style of preaching. I wanted him to meet my husband because even though both of us are Muslims, Muyiwa does not take Islam seriously. So I wanted the Alfa to talk to him.
Then one day, Alfa said he could sense that Muyiwa’s business was not going well and that he can help him do some ritual for business to come.
That was very true. In fact, things were very bad, so bad my husband was not even going to his shop anymore. He is a printer at Ilupeju.
When I told him what the Alfa said he became interested and said I should invite the Alfa to our house. I did.
They spoke for some time and after that, the Alfa would visit and bring some concoction for Muyiwa to drink or bathe with. And he did those. After sometime, things began to pick up in his business. That was when he and Alfa became tight friends.
They would be discussing things that they won’t even let me know about. One day, my husband said Alfa asked him to buy a casket for money ritual but he didn’t want to buy it. I said, why can’t you? After all, you have seen the man can really do ‘work’.
But he was reluctant, so I begged him and he said Alfa told him the coffin will be in a room where only him will go to. I was a little afraid but I said ok, after all when the money comes, I too will enjoy from it.
Remember, I told you my husband and Alfa became tight friends?
They will come home and give me things to drink, concoctions. They say it will help my husband’s star to rise. I began to drink those things and after sometime, I was not really myself again; in fact, I stopped my market at that time, I was always home because it will be as if I am in a trance as if my environment is not real but a dream.
One day, Alfa came to meet me at home. He began to behave funny, you know when a man wants to have his way with you…I remember trying to resist him, telling him my husband would soon come home. But he said I shouldn’t worry about my husband, that my husband knows what is going on.
It didn’t make sense to me, my sister. I was feeling one-kind.
It was as if I was under some powerful force controlling me. Before I knew it, we were in our bedroom, my clothes were gone and Alfa was on top of me, he was doing it with me!
In my mind, far, far away, I knew this was wrong!
What sort of thing is this, I looked up, expecting to see my husband’s face but it was the Alfa’s face on top of me. I could not fight him, I could not even shout. What sort of dream is this?
When he was done, he got up, I was just lying there, looking. He dressed up and left. I couldn’t believe what just happened. But my body felt used, so even if my mind was deceiving me that this was a dream, my body knew somebody had used it, there was sperm all over my thighs and the bed.
Quickly, I managed to get up, clean myself and change the bedsheet before my husband came back.
Tell me my sister, how do you tell your husband Alfa came and raped you in your own house? Me, at my age? Shame and fear did not let me open my mouth.
The following day, Alfa came again. I had the same feeling that he was not really there but that it was my husband that had come to have sex with me. But after he was done there was the same sperm on the bed, and on my legs. Third day, same thing…that was when I knew I was in trouble. My body felt used.
Is this how this Alfa will be coming to have sex with me every day? And even at this time, it was as if I was losing my mind, I had become emaciated, I was not eating or sleeping well so I ran to my sister’s house at Ipaja.
It was at Ipaja I now told my sister and her friend what has been happening to me and that was when everything was exposed!
They took me to report the Alfa and my husband to the police because now it was obvious to me both of them wanted to use me for ritual money making. I mean look at the casket in the house and all the concoctions they gave me to drink.
I had begun to lose my mind gradually that I even stopped market and it was all after that Alfa came three times, three times to have sex with me. What does that tell you?
The police went to arrest the Alfa. They arrested him and accused him of giving me poison. Then my husband ran away. They couldn’t find him to arrest him.
It was later still at the police cell, that Alfa told police he has a cure to help me, he promised to get me some herbs to cure me. Although I was still afraid to take anything from the Alfa, but my people said maybe indeed he has a cure because I tell you, I have been to hospitals and they say they don’t know what is wrong with me.
I had no choice but to take Alfa’s concoction again. Believe it or not, I began to get well after that. I began to eat well though I am not fully recovered but inside me, I knew relief.
As for my so-called husband, he resurfaced when they told him I was well. He came back to accuse me of sleeping with Alfa. Can you imagine that!
That is why we have come to court to dissolve the marriage. I am done with him!
compiled by Peju Akande
-Based on a true story. However, names and places have been changed to protect the identities of characters