Have you guys seen the H2O advert featuring Mr “I-will-slay-more-than-you-at-your-own-event” Ebuka and the beautiful Adesua Etomi?
Of course you have.
Many people loved the concept of the advert, the fun it portrayed and the high video quality.
But me and my cynical self, saw it and thought meh. This is normal because nothing excites me anyways. I thought it would wear off with time but the more I saw the advert on social media, and bill boards the more my face settled more into the meh position. I was being cynical of course, in my head why should we be producing flavored water that would make actual water jealous when there’s no actual water for people to drink in this Lagos?
Remember that time I talked about the water problems in Lagos? If you live on the mainland, you have two options: Wait for the Lagos state water board to supply you water which means you don’t REALLY need water or supply your own water (as the minister of water). So you get your own borehole, pump your own water with electricity or (as is more common) with your generator (Ehen, add Minister of Power to your title). There’s a third option, buy from the northern boys who hawk water with gallons.
It is almost the same if you live on the Island only that you cannot even use the water you pump yourself, so you have to install a water treatment plan. (What Ministry is this? Oya add it too to your title). In all of these, you still can’t drink tap water in Lagos. Get sachet water if you have grown immune to typhoid or bottles.
So we can agree that Lagos has a water problem, yes? Which is why my face went meh when I saw the advert but you see it is not the responsibility of 7up (makers of the H2O) to provide Lagosians with water? Did we elect 7up and do we pay taxes to them to provide basic amenities?
Anyways o, that was how I found myself thirsty last week. The sun was not exactly hot but I needed a drink. I didn’t want something too sugary, or too bland either. All the stores around me didn’t have my regular sprite, 7up or Limca. What to do? One of the sales girl offered me H2O. I raised my eye brow up, like why are you offering me this spawn of the capitalist system? She convinced me that it was ok, perfect for what I wanted and I was thirsty so I thought, hmmm lemme just try it o jare.
I was prepared to hate it so that I can tell the girl she will pay me my N100 back, but I took a gulp and liked it. I love it. It is almost my favorite drink now. ( Oya, stop laughing at me).
I was so prepared to hate the drink so that I’ll have more things to say but truly it was nice. It was a wake-up call from my cynicism. I felt really silly.
No, this isn’t a paid post, I do not know the owners or makers of the drink. This experience just reminded me of the many ways we as Nigerians blame private businesses for the failure of our government.
A more recent example: DSTV was taken to court over price increment. Why? How is the DSTV pricing model the problem of the average Nigerian? How will the price going up or staying down affect the cost of food in the market?
The other time people were on social media asking the government to ban the reality TV show Big Brother Naija because it makes youths lazy and doesn’t provide jobs. Did Big Brother promise you youth employment during the last elections?
In conclusion o, don’ be cynical like me, blame the people robbing us, and while you are at it, GET YOUR PVC. August 31st is almost here!
Happy weekend, fam