Shia LaBeouf, who comes from a mixed Jewish and Christian household, revealed he converted to Catholicism after being cast in Padre Pio as the titular character.
As he researched the late Italian monk and stayed in a monastery to prepare for his role in Abel Ferrara’s upcoming film, the 36-year-old actor said he became drawn to spirituality as he battled suicidal ideation and deep-rooted feelings of shame.
‘I had a gun on the table. I was outta here,’ the Honey Boy star told Bishop Robert Barron during an 80-minute interview, uploaded to YouTube on Thursday.
He explained: ‘I didn’t want to be alive anymore when all this happened. Shame like I had never experienced before — the kind of shame that you forget how to breathe. You don’t know where to go. You can’t go outside and get like, a taco.’
Despite helping helpless, Emmy Award winner said he still had a ‘deep desire to hold on.
‘He also noted that he did not accept the role as Padre Pio to find God, but feels his fate was all part of God’s plan.
‘I know now that God was using my ego to draw me to Him. Drawing me away from worldly desires. It was all happening simultaneously,’ he explained.
The performer added: ‘But there would have been no impetus for me to get in my car, drive up [to the monastery] if I didn’t think, ‘Oh, I’m gonna save my career.”
Learning about atonement and forgiveness also allowed him to believe he is worthy of a second chance.
‘It was seeing other people who have sinned beyond anything I could ever conceptualize also being found in Christ that made me feel like, ‘Oh, that gives me hope,’ LaBeouf told the bishop. ‘I started hearing experiences of other depraved people who had found their way in this, and it made me feel like I had permission.’
This comes after his ex-girlfriend, FKA Twigs sued him for sexual battery, he split with his talent agency CAA and he was fired from the Don’t You Worry Darling in 2021.
After the public scandals, LaBeouf’s attorney told Variety he knew he ‘needs help’ and began ‘seeking the kind of meaningful, intensive, long-term inpatient treatment that he desperately’ needed.
The actor has denied causing Twigs “any injury or loss” despite her claims she suffered ‘relentless abuse’ during their relationship, which she described as a ‘living nightmare.’ (DailyMail)