Top Stories with Uzoma

Lagos State’s bromance with Chinese restaurant

The Lagos State Government has cleared the Chinese restaurant accused of racism, saying through a press statement issued by the Commissioner for Tourism, Arts and Culture, Steve Ayorinde, that findings by its officers sent to “investigate the veracity of the claim” showed that the allegations were false.

He said: “The officers were served without any questions or discrimination. They also took photographs without being noticed. Our officers also observed that the restaurant had a number of Nigerians working inside there and did similarly observe that pepper soup, a Nigerian delicacy, is also on the menu.” Blood of Jet Li, what’s the connection between the restaurant having pepper soup on their menu and them not letting Nigerians in? Are we all well in this Naija?

 

No more poopooing anyhow – FG

The Federal Government has disclosed that open defecating would be outlawed in Nigeria by 2025. This was revealed by Minister of Water Resources, Mr. Suleiman Adamu at an event to mark the World Water Day.

Adamu disclosed that the government was aware of the importance of clean water, the need for proper sanitation and hygiene and was working assiduously to create a proper environment for its citizens. Haba, y’all must be joking o. 2025? By that time Lagos will be ‘smelling nice’.

 

Agbaje still gum body with us, says PDP

The Peoples Democratic Party (PDP) has debunked a rumour that its candidate for the 2019 gubernatorial election in Lagos State Jimi Agbaje has dumped the party. “This is to disclaim the rumour going around, that our governorship candidate, Mr Olujimi Agbaje, has left the PDP,” the State Secretary of the party, Prince Muiz Dosumu said in a statement.

Agbaje was rumoured to have dumped the opposition party because of an unresolved issue following his loss during the gubernatorial election in the state. “This is an absolute fallacy and could only have happened in the imagination of the rumour peddler,” Dosumu added. I’m even surprised Jimi Agbaje is in the news. I thought we weren’t supposed to hear from him until the next gubernatorial elections in Lagos.

 

Nigeria vs Seychelles: off to a bad start

The 2019 African Cup of Nations (AFCON) qualifier between the Super Eagles of Nigeria and Seychelles national team will hold on Friday at the Stephen Keshi Stadium, Asaba without a functional scoreboard. The scoreboard mounted at the Stephen Keshi Stadium in Asaba, the Delta State capital, collapsed on February 6 due to heavy winds, destroying a section of the stadium.

Repair work has not commenced on both the scoreboard and water tank (which collapsed in August 2018), contrary to earlier promise by the state’s commissioner for Information, Patrick Ukah. Na like this the thing dey start. Later we fit come hear say players no like match bonus wey NFF promise them. Mtcheew.

 

Fishy vegan business

Yovana Mendoza Ayres, a 28-year-old vegan, fitness, and lifestyle influencer and vlogger, was caught in a video eating fish and has come under an onslaught of vicious criticism for her “crime”. Ayres has explained to her followers that she began to deviate from her raw vegan diet after noticing her periods had become irregular, and that her struggles with fatigue had worsened.

She started to incorporate eggs and fish into her diet two months ago in an attempt to “put [her] health first.” “That’s exactly why I hadn’t shared it with you. For me, it’s still an experiment,” she said. Hmmm. People can carry matter for their head sha. If Jesus were in this era, he would have told them: “Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a kpomo at her.”

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