Dancing Time for dancing senator
The Election Petitions Tribunal set up for the 2018 governorship election in Osun State has declared Ademola Adeleke winner of the election. The three-man panel reportedly delivered its ruling in Abuja Friday afternoon saying that the rerun election that held on September 27 was illegal. The tribunal therefore deducted the votes scored by the APC candidate Gboyega Oyetola at the rerun illegal. The tribunal said Mr Adeleke won the election at the first ballot on September 22, and the rerun that INEC devised to reach a final conclusion a week later was illegal. Wow. So Davido leaving NYSC camp (story for another day) to support his uncle don pay off? This is the assurance OBO didn’t know he needed.
Nigeria jaga jaga, e no dey kampe – Obasanjo
Former President Olusegun Obasanjo has raised the alarm that Nigeria was more divided and in danger over the current state of disunity in the country. The former President stated this on Thursday while speaking at a one-day 2019 annual retreat/conference and general meeting of members of Association of Chief Audit Executives of Banks in Nigeria held in Abeokuta. He said, “When we look at this country today, even during the civil war, we were not as divided as we are today.” O God, I don tire for these past leaders and their talk, talk, talk. Next!
Gba break, no hurry in life – INEC tells Okorocha
The Independent National Electoral Commission (INEC) on Thursday insisted that it would not reward bad conduct by presenting certificates of return to candidates who its officials declared winners under duress. The commission, however said it could issue the certificates based on court judgement or decision of an election petitions tribunal.
INEC’s National Commissioner and Chairman of its Information and Voter Education Committee, Festus Okoye, said, “The position of the commission has not changed. The position of the commission is that we will not issue certificate of return to Governor Rochas Okorocha in relation to the senatorial election…If at the end of the day, the court gives an order that we should give him his certificate of return, of course, the commission will obey such a court order… As of today, the matter is pending in court, the best thing to do is to wait for the outcome of the judicial process.” Make una no blame Okorocha at all. The man is only acting out the words of Matthew 11: 12.
Much ado about haircuts
A barber’s association in a northern Bangladesh town has warned its members not to give “foreign” haircuts or beard styles or risk paying a fine. Flamboyant hairstyles adopted by some of the Bollywood and Hollywood movie heroes and top cricketers have become increasingly popular among young men in Bangladesh, where short and neat cuts used to be the norm. The head of the association Shekhar Chandra Sheel said they took the measure following a request from the local police chief. “He asked us not to cut hair and beard following the Western model. He said these hairstyles are spoiling our young generation,” he said. LOL. Nowadays, it seems everything is out to spoil the young generation. All these culture-preservers, una go dey alright las las.
‘If you no do BDSM, wetin you gain?’
According to a new study, couples who are into BDSM have better sex lives. BDSM, which stands for bondage, domination and sado masochism is the umbrella term given to people who enjoy kinky sex. The study, published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine, compared 266 couples who are actively into BDSM with 200 couples who are categorically not into it. It found that the kinkisters reported ‘a very low self-declared degree of distress.’ Fillipo Maria Nimbi, who led the study, does acknowledge limits in the study, explaining that the sample was drawn from an online survey shared mainly among BDSM communities in Italy. Wawu. Seriously, a lot of Lagosians engage in BDSM but they don’t know it yet. We call it Lagos traffic.