JAMB ready to jam offenders
The Head, Media and Information of the Joint Admissions and Matriculation Board (JAMB), Fabian Benjamin, has said during an interview that the body has launched a probe into the credentials of applicants dating back to 2009.
This implies that persons who cheated the system to pass the Unified Tertiary Matriculation Examination to get into school and may have even graduated and participated in the National Youth Service Corps will be arrested and their certificates withdrawn.
“We want to do what we call biometric verification dating 10 years back. Even if you are now working and we discovered that someone wrote exams for you, we will publish your name and the law agencies will do the needful,” Mr Benjamin said.
Haba! Which kain thing is this one again? So now somebody cannot commit small sin of years ago and sleep with two eyes closed?
Ambode will be missed, or not
The Committee for the Defence of Human Rights has described the outgoing Governor of Lagos State, Mr Akinwunmi Ambode, as “an achiever that Lagosians will miss.” Mr Alex Omotehinse, the Chairman of the Lagos State branch of CDHR, said Ambode’s achievements were numerous for any resident to gloss over or forget soon.
“Without any fear or favour and with utmost sincerity, Mr Akinwunmi Ambode has demonstrated his genuine sincerity of purpose and pro-people’s policy in governance which has distinguished him as an achiever in less than four years, between 2015 and 2019,” Mr Omotehinse said.
“The working governor has touched almost every nook and cranny of the state in terms of developmental projects that are visible for any doubting Thomas to see…We believe Lagosians have started missing him from the day he was denied a second term ticket by his party.”
LOL. Even Ambode won’t miss Ambode-in-the-State-House.
Buhari tired of the blame game
The Presidency has disagreed that President Muhammadu Buhari was “sleeping on duty as the Commander-in-Chief,” a description the Catholic Bishop of Yola Diocese, Rt Rev Fr Stephen Mamza, gave of Buhari on Sunday. The cleric had, during an Easter homily he delivered in Yola, the Adamawa State capital, criticised the Buhari administration for allegedly failing to halt insecurity in the country, especially escalating kidanappings, banditry and other violent crimes.
The Senior Special Assistant to the President on Media and Publicity, Mr Garba Shehu, who gave the Presidency’s position, stated, “Sadly, one of the realities of today’s Nigeria is that it is easy to blame President Buhari for the violence all around us. Community leaders are too scared to blame the warlords and the sponsors of killings we live with because they fear for their own lives.”
He explained, “What is happening in several communities racked by inter-ethnic and religious violence is arising from the refusal of community leaders to point at known criminals in their midst for the law enforcement agencies to act against them. They rather blame President Buhari for their woes.”
LOL. Even Satan that we blame all the time never complain, if we no blame our president, wetin we gain?
Tinubu vs Saraki: Harvest of accusations and counter accusations
President of the Senate, Bukola Saraki, has challenged the National Leader of the All Progressives Congress, Asiwaju Bola Tinubu, to prove that he has padded the national budgets since 2015. Former Lagos State governor Tinubu in a statement accused Saraki and the Speaker of the House of Representatives, Yakubu Dogara, of padding national budgets since they came to power, saying, “National budgets were delayed and distorted as these actors repeatedly sought to pad budgets with pet projects that would profit them.” In a statement by his Special Adviser on Media and Publicity, Mr Yusuph Olaniyonu, on Monday, Saraki slammed the allegation as “careless, irresponsible and callous”.
“Since we have taken it for granted that Tinubu’s attack on Saraki every three months will come as expected, we would just have ignored his statement but for the fact that it was filled with untruth, fallacies and misrepresentations. The statement was another effort to sell a concocted narrative about the 8th National Assembly and its leadership,” he said.
“Tinubu should be graceful enough to substantiate this allegation. We consider that allegation careless, irresponsible and callous. We, therefore, demand that he withdraws it.”
…Tinubu’s attack on Saraki every three months will come as expected. Hahahahaha. Our politicians and their wicked sense of humour is unmatched.
Not wanted: Smoking professors
A Japanese university, Nagasaki University, has stopped hiring professors and teachers who light up, officials said Tuesday, as the nation steps up an anti-smoking campaign ahead of the 2020 Olympics.
The university’s spokesman Yusuke Takakura said they have “stopped hiring any teaching staff who smoke”, although applicants who promise to kick the habit before taking up their post could still be offered employment. The university will also ban smoking entirely on campus from August, opening a clinic for those who cannot give up.
“We have reached a conclusion that smokers are not fit for the education sector,” the spokesman said, adding that the university had sought legal advice and does not believe the policy contravenes discrimination laws.
Mtcheww. Who tell una say smokers are not fit for the education sector? They are only ‘liable to die young’.