In commemoration of Father’s Day
Every third Sunday in June is celebrated as Father’s Day. It is a special occasion that allows us to express our love and gratitude towards the remarkable men who have played a significant role in our lives. We honour and celebrate fathers, stepfathers, grandfathers, uncles, big brothers, and all father figures who have devoted themselves to their families and made countless sacrifices. The role of a father in the family and the life of the future generation is very key. It is important to acknowledge a father’s invaluable contributions and the profound impact they have on the lives of the future generation.
Fathers hold a unique place in a child’s life, bringing their own set of qualities, guidance, and love to the family unit. While the role of a father may have evolved, their influence remains timeless and vital.
Fathers influence their children’s emotional, cognitive, and social development in numerous ways. They offer stability and structure to their children’s lives, instilling a sense of security and confidence. Through their consistent presence, they create a foundation for growth, enabling children to navigate life’s challenges. They serve as powerful role models for their children, teaching important life skills, values, and principles. From honesty and integrity to perseverance and responsibility, they shape the character and moral compass of their offspring.
Providing emotional support and creating a safe space for their children to express their feelings and vulnerabilities is another key fatherhood function. Offering guidance, encouragement, and reassurance, and nurturing their children’s emotional well-being ensures that they can become well-rounded individuals. Fathers play an integral role in fostering healthy relationships within the family. They demonstrate love, respect, and cooperation, serving as a bridge between family members and encouraging strong bonds.
Fathers embrace a multitude of roles within their families, donning various hats as they navigate the complexities of life. The main expectation of a father is to be the provider and protector. Fathers work diligently to provide for their families, ensuring their loved ones have the necessities of life. They assume the responsibility of meeting financial obligations and protecting their families from harm. Fathers are also teachers and mentors, imparting wisdom and knowledge gained from their own experiences. They guide their children, teach them life skills, and offer valuable insights that shape their growth and development.
Maintaining a social relationship is also another key role of a father. Being available not just to help with school work or advice depending on age but also to play and socialise, creating lasting memories and bonds. Fathers can share strong connections with their children by getting more involved in their children’s activities, being adventurous, and offering companionship.
Unfortunately, not a lot of people of older generations experienced fathers who showed both strict and loving sides. I recall listening to a friend who shared how his father constantly beat him and I was sad. He ended up having a strained relationship with his father who couldn’t understand why his son didn’t want to relate with him often. My friend had been scarred and seeing his father as anyone other than he had experienced was a tough one for him. As far as his father was concerned, all of his actions had been done in love to mould his son into becoming a strong man.
I always believe that our experiences ought to help us shape our lives in better ways. My friend is a lot more deliberate in how he relates with his children. They are comfortable with him and he encourages them to speak their minds often. The children in turn are quite confident around him and they trust that he has their best interests at heart.
Fatherhood is a role that is learned on the job. No matter how many professional courses one takes on parenting or how many educational videos one watches, the true test of fatherhood only comes when one plays the role of a father. Many men have found themselves as fathers or father figures and for a multitude of reasons, have been found wanting.
Some fathers spend a lot of time working as they strive to provide for their home. They leave home before sunrise and aren’t back until the sun sets. They rarely get to see their children and possibly miss key milestones in their lives. Providing for the home is a key focus but very often, they end up not developing important relationships with their children. Conversely, some fathers have been found wanting in providing for their families. Such men may be experiencing economic hardship and their absence in contributing to the home is filled by their wives. Many men in this position find it hard to focus and may end up becoming emotionally disconnected from the family.
Modelling the right behaviours and attitudes for children will forever be superior to telling children what they can and cannot do. The father’s mantra should be “Do as I do and not do as I say”. The wisdom and lessons passed down by fathers leave an indelible mark on their children’s lives. Some valuable lessons we learn from our fathers (and should pass on to our children) include:
- Hard Work and Perseverance: understanding the value of hard work, resilience, and determination. Fathers can, through their actions, inspire their children to pursue their dreams, overcome obstacles, and never give up.
- Integrity and Honour: Fathers instil the importance of integrity, teaching children to be honest, trustworthy, and honourable individuals. They demonstrate the significance of living with strong moral values.
- Unconditional Love and Support: Fathers can exemplify unconditional love, supporting children through every triumph and tribulation. By doing this, they show their children that they are cherished and valued, no matter the circumstances.
Father’s Day provides us with an opportunity to show our fathers and father figures how much we appreciate them. Here are meaningful ways to celebrate this special day:
- Write a heartfelt letter or message to your father, expressing your deep appreciation for everything he has done. Let him know how much he means to you and how his presence has positively impacted your life.
- Plan a special day for your father, tailored to his interests and preferences. It could involve activities he enjoys, a thoughtful gift, or spending quality time together, creating cherished memories.
- Gather your family to celebrate Father’s Day. Organise a family outing, prepare a delicious meal, or engage in activities that honour your father and strengthen family bonds.
Father’s Day should not just be a date on the calendar; it should be a day to recognise and honour the remarkable men who have shaped our lives. Let us celebrate the selflessness, guidance, and sacrifices of fathers, and appreciate their invaluable contributions. Today, and every day, let’s express our heartfelt gratitude and remind our fathers that they are cherished and admired for the role they play in our lives.
And for young fathers or those who are new to fatherhood, seek out older or more experienced men who can guide and advise you in your journey of fatherhood. This is the way I see things today.