I am sorry things got so out of hand but I honestly, I am a good person.
I am just 26 years old and still looking for a job. I try to keep out of trouble as much as possible because I have a drug addiction problem which is a big reason why I have landed in this trouble today.
When you are on drugs, it just messes you up, you are not thinking straight or behaving rationally.
I came to Lagos not too long ago. Because of my drug addiction, my mother advised to go to Lagos to live with my uncle. She thought that with a male figure watching out for me, I won’t get into trouble.
Why do I take drugs sef? Madam, with no job, no money to have a nice time, it is normal to feel down, so I take drugs, to forget my sorrows.
I am a graduate, an HND graduate of Engineering from a Polytechnic and in the past three years after my NYSC, I have not got one single job.
So, I sometimes take Rephenol just to take my mind off things.
How did I know about Rephenol? I began to take it when I was in school. I belonged to the Viking Fraternity. I joined in my first year at school. If you have to be a hard man, you can’t do it with ordinary eye, you need something to pump your blood, so one of my frat guys introduced me to the drug and since then, when I take it, I am in a good place.
Ok, so I was not feeling too good that day, it was a Friday, and I was broke as usual and alone with no girlfriend.
How will you have a girlfriend in Lagos if you don’t have money, in short, how will you manage anything with no money? Anyway as a young man sometimes konji can be a bastard, So, once in a while, I would go down to the bar to pick up an ashy, have fun and gist small if the person is in the mood.
That was what I did that Friday, but I was already high. I met her at the bar and we struck up conversation. I knew she was a prostitute and she knew I wanted a good time. We did not discuss money because I told her that was not a problem and that I had no intention of going to her room, I told her we would go to my place. That is my uncle’s place, where I stay.
At the house, I just wanted to rush her, I was really in the mood, I also knew I had to be fast because my uncle would come back and I didn’t want him to come and find an ashy in his house, he would be very angry with me. But she said she must first collect money that I have already spent one hour with her at the bar, so I must pay for two hours since it will be one round and that is 1 hour. I was angry.
Who told her it would be one 1 round and 1 hour?
I said, no, it will be two and we are not counting the time we spent at the bar.
But she was just shouting. And we have nosy neigbhours. So, I was trying to keep her quiet and wanted to close her mouth, but she was running around the house and shouting loudly. The woman had a loud voice.
Here I was already in the mood for fun and this one is busy telling me to bring money.
I just grabbed her and was trying to remove her clothes, she started shouting, ‘He wan killi me, o, hep me, he wan killi me!’
That was how I got angry and picked up the kitchen knife, just to threaten her small, I didn’t even plan it. I wanted to use it to scare her to shut up but when she saw the knife, her voice just went up, up. she was calling neighbours to come and help her, at this time, I wasn’t even thinking straight. I just used the knife to stab her in the neck…come and see blood!
I didn’t know human beings have so much blood.
Unfortunately for me, neighbours were already at the door and when I opened the door to quickly try to escape, the neighbours did not let me go, they stopped me when they saw the girl on the floor. They said I must carry her, at that time, she was just gasping and holding her neck as blood was still pouring out.
I didn’t know she would die. I was very surprised that I was even the one responsible for her death. So, I am really sorry, I was already high and I was in the mood for sex, so how can a common prostitute deny me sex?
That is what happened, o and police came to carry me.
Please forgive me.
(Series written and edited by Peju Akande and based on true stories)
photo credit