Cheating husbands and vengeful wives

Last Sunday, the story of a woman in Cross River state, Claret Opara Bassey, who died while chasing after her husband, Mr. Sunday Bassey and his side chick left me wondering what possessed the woman to such stupidity?

I said stupidity, mindful of the fact that you don’t speak ill of the dead; mindful of the fact that we all behave stupidly on impulse; mindful of the fact that there are other ways to catch a thief, even a cheating husband than going at breakneck speed.

I remember the story of one woman, who followed her husband and his side chick to Ede! Of all places, Ede, somewhere in Oyo state. She knocked on the door to the guest room her husband had camped in with his babe, the man opened the door and almost had a heart attack, he was said to have told her, “I tried, I tried for you.” Meaning he tried to avoid his wife catching him and yet, she followed him from Lagos to Ede!

What if she had died on the road? What if she had been kidnapped?

Now, back to Claret; Claret and Sunday are reported to have three children and have been married for just 10 years.

It was reported that the Claret’s friend had sighted Sunday with a babe at a mall and had called Claret about it. Claret had raced to the mall in another car, sighted her husband who had sped off, she gave chase, lost control of the car and crashed into a tree…she died afterwards. Incidentally, it was her husband who upon seeing the accident from his rear view mirror, stopped his car and ran to rescue her.

But it was too late for Claret.

I’m truly sorry this woman had to end up like this…but over what?

That Claret chased after her philandering husband says one thing though, they must have been having issues over his infidelity and most likely he had been denying it, so she was looking for proof; this became her proof, now the world is spectating over his marital affairs.

The said side chick was reported to have fled the scene when the husband stopped to go help his wife, I doubt that she would ever have any relationship with Sunday, ever again!

Sunday will always remember her as the woman who made him lose his wife; his life and everything that had meaning, he’ll be like this for the next few months, at least.

There’s more, how will Sunday look himself in the mirror? He would remember some of and got away with many escapes; what of those whos wives looked the other way despite the many girlfriends they had. Why couldn’t Claret just let me do my thing jeje?

He would remember side chicks who’ve mastered the art of anonymity and carry on for years with their aristos…”why my own come be like this?” He would wonder, over and over again.

And while at it, he would cast blames on his dead wife; why didn’t she just stay at home and watch the kids?

Why isn’t she like other women who looked the other way when their men go chasing pants?

Why has she decided to ruin his life even in her death?

I don’t have answers for Sunday, he will be eaten by guilt and grief for a long time to come.

There will also be some shame for Sunday, I’m assuming his children are still young if he has just been married for 10years like a report said. Facing his own children and accounting for the role he played in their mother’s death will be bitter; there may even be trouble for him with his in-laws who will ensure the children are given the gory details leading to their mother’s death and their father’s role in it.

Life won’t be for Sunday as he knew it

But it can be argued that Sunday didn’t kill his wife…well, his actions led to her death and that’s a huge thing on anyone’s conscience but he could argue that she caused her own death as many are saying.

There are phone cameras that record cheating husbands and wives for that matter, why didn’t Claret use her phone to film her husband as proof of his infidelity?

When she gave chase, what did she hope to achieve? Catch him a cheat and then what?

Did she spare a thought for their children should anything bad happen to her?

I don’t know what raced through Claret’s mind, I do know though, that it had rage, it had threats, it had vengeance. She must have been like, “If I catch him….if I catch him…I’m going to … “

So she accelerated some more before losing control of the vehicle!

I read comments on Claret’s death across many platforms and one theme resonates through all the comments, don’t chase after cheating husbands, it’s never pretty in the long run!

But men aren’t the only ones cheating in relationships, women do, too and with greater proficiency if stories we hear are anything to go by, women are now surpassing men at cheating and are even better at hiding it!

Here’s note to everyone in a relationship; there’s a potential cheat in everyone.

Though, not everyone will cheat, regardless of the circumstances, only few people have the cheat genes ravaging their bodies. As for the rest who never planned on cheating but end up doing so; someone said, “there is always something, someone, circumstances, places, things, that draws them into cheating on their significant others. and if your will power isn’t strong enough, you cheat”

Speaking of people who had no intention of cheating but end up doing so, some women, under the anonymity provided by some platforms, are confessing to cheating on their husbands.

One anonymous commenter, claimed her husband had slept with so many women among them her friends, her sister’s house help, their daughter’s teacher who even got pregnant, had a botched abortion and had the effrontery to report to the woman how her husband abandoned her!

The long and short of this strange story is the woman is now a side chick to her husband’s finance’s side chick.

Funny story, right?

Another commenter confessed to having three boyfriends after she discovered her husband was cheating on her and she just couldn’t cope with the emotional damage it caused her.

It’s easy to say these stories are fiction but I’ve heard too many stories in my life to understand many real life stories are stranger than fiction!

I’m no expert on what cheating does or doesn’t do, I do know for a fact that, when one partner cheats, it destroys the confidence, the self esteem, the emotional balance of their partners and experts will tell you there’s a lot more damage than these, however, the next line of action for the other partner shouldn’t be to chase after the cheater and the person they are cheating with.

No point dying an untimely death because of your partner’s indiscretion. Life is too sweet and it’s short, why make it even shorter.